when you peel a sticker off something and it does the thing
My favorite thing to burn.
OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE
THEIR SLOGAN IS “STRONGER THAN GREASE”
AND I WAS LIKE OKAY YEAH MAKES SENSE FOR A DISH SOAP- WAIT
AJAX WAS A GREEK SOLDIER RENOWNED FOR HIS STRENGTH
AJAX IS STRONGER THAN ALL OF GREECE
someone who worked at ajax has literally waited 66 years for you to get this
being a humor blogger is like being a stand up comedian with out the pressure
the first smut i ever read was about a girl listening to these people having sex in a bathroom stall and when they were done she snuck in and it was like “she saw semen all over the floor and bent over to pick one up”
she picked up a sperm
All you need to know about Jesse Pinkman in two screencaps
Friend: Ill be there in 5 minutes are you ready?
if you kill a guy who has a boner does his penis continue to be erect or what
Yes. It does actually. And when they go to the morgue to be prepared for burial, the person cleaning them up and such breaks it so it lays flat.
“So what do you do for a living?
“I put makeup on dead people and snap boners.”
when you see someone hot talking to your crush
i remember one time this dude sent me a shirtless pic with the caption “lol maybe u can save this for a rainy day ;)”
and i was like “for what? to keep me dry? because that’s what it’s doing right now”
minute and minute shouldn’t be spelled the same
im not content with this content
i object to that object
I need to read what I read again
Excuse me but there’s no excuse for this
Someone should wind this post up and throw it in the wind
i hope you dont mind but you just fucked with my mind